In the United States, striving for independence and maintaining our freedoms remain some of our highest espoused ideals. These values deeply infuse our culture, impact our worldview and influencing our daily actions, in ways that may seem so natural as to be beneath our notice. Even if we do not always agree on what constitutes freedom or the appropriate expression of independence, we tend to nevertheless nearly universally chafe at situations which threaten our sense of individual agency… the given norm. Part of what makes navigating this coronavirus so painful is that we may feel that we lack sufficient control over our lives. That’s hard.

         While I am tempted to digress into a philosophical discussion critically examining the concept of “control,” in the midst of this chaotic and uncertain time, it is natural to desire to maintain some semblance of personal power and active choice. So instead, I will encourage you to latch onto an area in your life where you do possess significant agency. What if the quality of your educational journey were primarily up to you?

         Some folks enter college with the idea that their professors serve to educate them. Ideally in an entertaining way, or perhaps an earth shatteringly thought-provoking manner. True, some of us are that fabulous. However, this model of the educational experience is based upon the old-fashioned understanding that the job of a professor is to transfer knowledge to their students. In this framework, the task of the student may be to take notes, memorize concepts, parrot information back to the professor. Probably forget it later on. This is what Paulo Freire refers to as the “banking model” of education, in his influential work, Pedagogy of the Oppressed. The professor deposits knowledge, which the students receive and return. Some people actually prefer this standard model, as this approach does not require much thinking or effort, either on the part on the professor or on the part of the student. One can simply go through the routine and “mail it in.”

Bollocks. That is not an education.

         Whatever teaching model your professors actually use in their classroom, for your own sake, forget passively expecting the teacher to dump information into your head. Instead, charge into that classroom, even if it’s a virtual space, pro-actively looking to learn. Investigate! Explore! Search! Question! Read and prepare in advance to engage in conversation with your peers about the topics before you. Unpack the concepts. Wrestle with the theories and the practices to which you are being introduced, and decide what you think about them. Develop your own perspective, as you ponder deeply, and allow yourself to be challenged into reflecting in new and different ways. Savor your agency.

         What you put into the activity of learning is exactly what you will get out of it. Academia provides you with a basic framework, or outline, which you color in and decorate as vibrantly as you choose. Decide to invest your heart and mind in the process, and I promise you, you will expand your worldview and be changed for the better. You, and only you, have the power and potential to make of your education a transformational experience. You may elect to thoughtfully undertake an enterprise that will shift who you are and how you act in the world. So, whether your instructors are mind-numbingly banal or soul-stirringly riveting, commit yourself to engage. Dive deeply into the material, read all the books and articles. Expand your horizons, by attending additional lectures and events “on” campus, when you still can, or by exploring the plethora of supplemental learning the internet has to offer. Make use of all the resources at your disposal. In other words, intentionally take advantage of opportunities that your professors, various college programs, and the broader world offer for your enrichment. Grab hold of that academic ball, and sprint with it.

 Educate yourself.

At the risk of blowing up this blog, with one of the more important Things the Professor Cannot Actually Say, I will note, simultaneously gently and firmly, that higher education is presently a privilege. That’s a weighted word right now, loaded with potential landmines, in the midst of considerable societal discord. I employ it intentionally—to name the unfortunate reality that holding social and economic advantages currently contributes to one’s ability to obtain a university education in the United States, as well as to invoke the more general definition of the word, involving a “unique opportunity.” A study released in 2010 by Harvard University and the Asian Development Bank noted that slightly less than 7% of the entire world population had a college degree. To put it more bluntly, if you are reading this blog, globally speaking, you are currently one of the privileged few to consider or to attend university— even, and especially, if that constitutes a personal financial stretch and sacrifice on your part, or you experience a dearth of privilege in other realms.

         As a nation, we have unquestionably made significant strides, in terms of expanding opportunities for people to enter academia. For centuries, for example, women and BIPOC have been completely denied access to higher education, so if you fit that category and are looking into or are engaged in studying now, that’s a huge deal. Take a moment to celebrate that— even as you rightly name the inhibitions that continue to make pursuing a degree difficult for others. Notwithstanding such progress, that aforementioned 2010 study noted that only 28% of U.S. residents reported holding a bachelor’s degree or higher; by 2018, research indicated that the numbers had inched upwards to 35%, or roughly 1 in 3 people. If you are here, once again, please recognize that you remain one of the privileged few.

         As I suggested, social stratification and issues of significant injustice result in this relatively small percentage of the United States population being able to enjoy obtaining a college degree, at present. An entire series of blog posts might well be dedicated to a critical consideration of how to expand access to higher education, in order to draw the circle wider in the future. Certainly it would be worth our time and attention to explore how many of our peer nations in the world have deemed higher education to be a right, rather than a privilege, and have chosen to fund it accordingly. For the sake of this more introductory post, I will simply acknowledge the limited actuality of where we are today, so as to highlight the undeniable fact that venturing an academic journey is no mean feat.

         So, for the sake of all that is good, Dear Reader, please determine to make the most of this opportunity. As best you can, in the midst of a world tilted sideways. In a way that honors the distinctiveness of this precious gift.

         During a pandemic, I know full well that attending school is incredibly challenging. For my own part, I confess that I have to work up the energy to do many of the things in my life that I easily enjoyed before. As my daughter likes to say, at this historical moment, I possess a finite collection of “spoons” (units of stamina to distribute to tasks throughout my day). So I get that the oomph required to fulfill your academic requirements may be in short supply for you. I dare say that’s par for the course, right now, and please know that I believe in being mindful of what you can reasonably manage, as you pursue your education. (See my previous post, Musings on Study-Work Balance, for further thoughts on self care strategies.)

         That shared, one way that I endeavor to ensure that I maintain sufficient cutlery in my drawer, is for me to give attention to how I frame the task before me— as an opportunity. How I regard, think about, and discuss what I am doing matters. It’s a basic mental move that harkens back to the old adage about the power of positive thinking, a concept that has plenty of scientific study to support the basic premise, that our attitude makes a difference. Instead of saying to myself, “I have to go to class,” or “I have do my homework…blargh,” I re-frame the situation. Highlighting the benefits to me. So in my case, since I’ve been taking online art classes at the local college to raise my spirits during “quarantine,” I remind myself that “I get to make art now. I mean, I love to make art… so, how cool is that?” On pre-COVID days, I might not have needed to recall that I enjoy being creative, but just now, that helps. The shift in internal language enables me to re-orient my perspective and my approach to getting my homework done.

And broadly speaking, to summarize this post, remember:

 You get to go to college! You are one of the few folks on the entire planet with this chance. How amazing is that?

         If you decide to cherish this opportunity, and not simply float along or jump through the hoops for a degree, how might that alter your approach to your schooling? How would you act? My hope is that you have chosen to read this blog because you desire to embrace learning to the fullest. To revel in the process, even when it’s tremendously hard. If, indeed, you are here because you are intentionally choosing to cultivate a rich educational experience for yourself, then know that, in return, I am here supporting and rooting for you!

After focusing upon the joys of learning last time, here I recognize that higher education is not the end all, be all. We need enrichment beyond what an academic program can offer, especially because attending university requires a significant amount of work. So many students have related to me, some complaining, others speaking matter-of-factly, how many hours they have put into keeping up with their classes, or how late they stay up trying to get projects completed. On a good day, they often feel frazzled. During a pandemic…? Phew. Precisely because I know this is true, I propose to you that ideally in higher education, work and play comingle. Like, say, chocolate and peanut butter… or whatever imagery works deliciously well for you.

          Radical as it may sound coming from a professor, it is entirely possible to work too hard while you are in college. As a cautionary tale, I will share that I attended a graduate school where a fellow student was so stressed out that he smashed all of the coffee cups in the student café one day. Friends, you don’t wanna go that route, allowing yourself to build up frustration and dis-ease. Remember to make space in your life for a little chocolate, or a comforting mug of scrumptious hot cocoa. Ahem, I am not talking code for illicit substances here. I mean high quality, organic, responsibly sourced, no child labor, good ol’ tasty chocolate. Or whatever else, metaphorically and literally, is a healthy source of nourishment for you.

         If you ever find that college is losing its flavor, or if the peanut butter is feeling stuck to the roof of your mouth, identify what particularly nourishes you? What activities ground you, give you a sense of peace, or simply help you remember who you are? What reminds you that life is good? Got a hobby? Walking? Music? Athletics? Artistry? Reading? Meditation? Journaling? What is meaningful or relaxing for you? If you are not entirely certain, perhaps try something new, join an online club, or take part in an extracurricular student activity that can connect you virtually with others. Read a novel. Enjoy nature. Get some fresh air or exercise, rocking your hippest mask, to get the endorphins flowing. Take a hot shower.  Whatever revives you. And remember to eat and sleep well, that’s pretty essential. A lot of us are out of whack in this department right now, what with the world feeling topsy-turvy, so gently notice your own current patterns. A healthy balance of work and play in college means giving yourself permission to tend to your intellectual growth, while also remembering to enjoy life along the way.

         If your response to this invitation is to declare, “I don’t have time for that!”… ah! That is an important clue that it may be worth re-evaluating your schedule. Especially right now, when the pandemic has thrown us a curve ball, and time has lost some of its’ meaning, becoming elusive and more difficult to track, at least for me.  I suspect that for many of us, being forced to slow down because of pandemic restrictions has thrown into sharp relief the fact that the society in which we live promotes busy-ness to an unhealthy degree. Higher education often contributes to that phenomenon. (Which is why energy drink manufacturers sometimes set up tables around campuses.) Resist that intense pressure mill, my friend!

         Consider what will contribute to your learning in a holistic way. If you find you don’t have a moment to spare for attending to your overall well being, then ponder some alternatives. Might it be wise to consider decreasing the number of credits you are taking, if at all possible, or to select a class with a lighter work load? What if you grant yourself permission to say “no, thanks” to that extra task or event? Especially if you are simultaneously working a lot of hours to pay for your education; that struggle is real. In addition, remember, life is not a race. And if you cannot help but think in those terms, then recall the story of the tortoise and the hare… slow and steady. During the time of COVID-19, one inch at a time is progress, and sometime, making it through the day can be enough. With that in mind, ponder your particular situation and whether it may prove beneficial to adjust your expectations about how much you can manage, healthily and happily, right now.

         So, take a moment. Right now. Bring to mind what else helps sustain you? Do you have family members, friends, or colleagues who can act as safe havens, when you need to rest and recuperate on the journey? Keep in touch with them, via phone, text, or video conference. How about a mentor or counselor with whom you can meet with virtually for a dose of support? Go ahead and reach out. Do inspirational quotes, messages, or images, perhaps like “Tiny Potato,” make you smile? Place some of them in view, even if they are discretely tucked in a notebook or inside a drawer, to act as a stash of sunshine in your pocket to brighten your day. Take a break when necessary. Daily. Weekly. Monthly. Build rejuvenating moments away from your studies into your pattern of living. Little respites of time and space away will help make all the difference. Find a rhythm that works best for you!

         All of which is to invite you, Dear Reader, to be kind to yourself. Relinquish the habit of comparing yourself with what or where you imagined yourself to be, before the coronavirus hit. By this, I do not mean that you ought not continue to pursue your hopes and dreams— you need not dwell in a sort of suspended animation, hitting the pause button, waiting for the virus to eventually “pass.” Personal development and a healthy effort of working toward goals are essential components of human happiness and flourishing. Yet ideally, we can strive to become wiser, more compassionate, more competent versions of ourselves… at a pace that allows us to maintain a more even keel.

         In other words, I am gently nudging you to forego the interior drive to be a super perfect rock-star version of yourself, who not only earns straight As but otherwise embodies glowing bliss. Learn to let go of the false images of self we all carry, and live humbly into who you are, amidst the unique challenges we are facing now. Be patient with yourself in your process of ongoing learning and becoming, seeking a balanced approach to your educational endeavors, and allow yourself room to breathe.

        In my last post, I encouraged you to identify what motivates you to pursue higher education. Having acknowledged a broad spectrum of perfectly understandable reasons for attending college—from being swept along with the tide of good intentions, uncertain of your own desires, to having your eyes determinedly fixed on the prize at the end, in a degree— I want to ever so gently offer one of the first of many Things the Professor Cannot Actually Say. Both ends of that spectrum are embedded with the potential to allow you to miss the inherent beauty of the academic journey.

         Okay, it probably sounds cheesy to wax rhapsodic about the beauty of the journey. From my vantage point as an educator, I nevertheless hope you will at least consider adding to your personal repertoire of motivations for continuing your education: learning for the sake of learning. Most of us professors have studied for the long haul because we discovered that the process of learning itself is incredibly enriching. Engaging deeply with higher education allows you to gain new insights, explore different perspectives, and actively live the questions of meaning, identity, and value with which we naturally contend as human beings. That struggle to make meaning allows us to learn, develop, and grow, and is potentially life changing.

That’s pretty awesome.

Now, I recognize that not everyone has the same inner fire that charges academic types. However, having also been a mother, I have watched how children possess a natural curiosity. They are enraptured by discovery. You’ve probably witnessed it, that unbridled delight of a child, in seeing or learning something new. Do you remember that feeling yourself? Maybe… I really do hope… even moving beyond a memory from your childhood? Have you learned something new, and experienced a deep sense of satisfaction? I mention this phenomenon, because as an instructor, I have seen students evidently lose sight of the joy of learning. As you dig into your academic fields of choice, my fervent wish for you is that the process of learning will involve at least the occasional thrill of discovery. The frisson of excitement in encountering a new way of tackling a problem or of understanding the world.

         Not every assignment in your educational journey is going to leave you sizzling with energy. Some educational activities you may downright despise, and that is okay; in fact, noticing what moves you and what leaves you cold is important information to help you decide where to invest your time in taking future classes or pursuing a career. On the whole, though, consider that it is always easier to find something, when you are actively looking for it. And it is easier to experience joy and delight, with an open heart and mind. Being actively receptive is the key. As you approach learning, keep your eyes peeled, then, for any possibility of discovery, and believe me, you will have more fun along the way.

         That little tidbit of wisdom shared, if you are giving it your all and your university education does not afford you at least a taste of fulfillment, enough to keep you animated for the long haul of work toward your degree, then I invite you to take a step back. Pause. Evaluate. If you are not enjoying the process, as a whole, sometimes a change may be in order. Am I pursuing a course of study that truly vitalizes me? If not, why not? What may need to shift? What if I found a more supportive advisor or professor, who listens to me and my needs? What if I tried a different major… the one that I secretly enjoy? Is it possible that I might fare better in another program, or even in another, better match of a school? Allowing for the fact that COVID-19 is making everything harder, permit yourself to reflect on where your energy is, to notice where you experience a sense of deep satisfaction and feel joy, and then discover where that awareness leads you.

Why are we here? is the kind of question with which human beings have wrestled for millennia. A living question, one that endures for each generation and every person, because longing for a sense of identity and purpose for one’s life is at the root of the human journey. And unless you happen to study philosophy, ethics, or religious studies, it’s a line of inquiry that professors rarely get to follow, or voice. Which is a shame, since in my experience, students hunger for meaning, are probably spending a significant amount of energy seeking it, especially during a pandemic.

         How do we make meaning in the middle of chaos? When things are upside down, when we cannot connect with others as we used to, how do we figure out our place in the world? Dear Reader, one my goals in setting forth this blog is to walk with you in the dead of night, or during the foggy mid-day, when you find yourself facing such quintessential questions around discovering more deeply who you are, in the midst of all this. But before we dive into the deep end of the pool, let’s dip our toes into the water with a small piece of that bigger picture, and ask… why are you thinking about or already attending college?

         If you feel suddenly defensive, in hearing that question, let me reassure you that I am definitely not wondering why you, of all people, are here, engaging with the world of higher education. On the contrary, I affirm and celebrate that you have every right to be here! Yes, you. Indeed, I am utterly delighted that you are considering or have already embarked upon a potentially transformative academic adventure.

         With my opening query, I am merely and quite seriously inviting you to ponder, like an actor muses, “What’s my motivation?” You’ve heard the line—spouted dramatically by the earnest performer in a satirical show. It’s a classic shtick because actors do work to understand the needs and inner desires of their characters, so that they may portray their intentions more clearly. This practice of getting in touch with motivations derives from a basic theatrical insight that identifying what I want can help me determine how to act. With this helpful practice in mind, I’d like to begin with you…by asking, once again, what motivates you to get an education?

         Have you ever considered and identified your motivations? Do you know what you want from this academic experience? If maybe you haven’t given it much thought before now, you are not alone. In my experience, college simply seems like the next logical step in the natural progression of education for some folks. I have likewise encountered students who have drifted into academia out of a desire to assuage boredom, to satisfy burgeoning curiosity, or because of a vague inkling that they long for something more. Others have been intentionally nudged here by family, caregivers, teachers, mentors, or even friends, who have encouraged them to proceed, pointing out the potential academic and personal benefits of pursuing higher education. All worthwhile starting points.

         At the other end of the spectrum, maybe you have considered some of the benefits of obtaining an education for yourself and have latched onto a primarily practical reason for heading to college or grad school… the end goal. You want that degree, that piece of parchment which serves as a credential card to help you land that dream gig, in terms of your envisioned career. Perhaps you recognize that a degree may serve as a stepping stone into greater financial security and ideally personal fulfillment. Well and good, hold fast to that light at the end of the tunnel!

         Now, if you’ve read this far, and find yourself responding, what  “What light? I have no friggin’ clue why I am (even considering being) in college anymore… I got nothing.” I hear you. Some days are like that. Some entire years, say, when there is a freaking pandemic raging across the planet and acrimonious civil discord. Maybe you are feeling overwhelmed and struggling to know anything about yourself and your place in the world right now. You are not alone. I am going to gently encourage you to do the following:

1) Acknowledge the uncomfortable place of uncertainty and unknowing, and let it be just what it is. Be kind to yourself, as you sit with it.

2) Take a few deep breaths. Using your imagination, visualize an empty field. Now tell yourself what every farmer knows… in order for a field to produce a thriving crop, every so often, you need to let it rest. Fallow periods actually help rejuvenate the soil. That time of “nothing” serves to produce a greater yield down the line.

3) Then, like the character, Katniss Everdeen, in The Hunger Games trilogy, when she was striving to recover from her traumatic experience, start with what you do know. “My name is Katniss Everdeen. I’m from District 12.” State what you understand to be true about yourself. “I like poetry.” Or “I love to solve math problems.” Or “music makes me happy.” Or “I want to design video games.” Or “I long to make a difference.” Identify something that matters to you, and then see how you can connect that personal ideal or place of enjoyment to your next academic task. Making such a connection, however remote, may give you energy to take another small step down your college path, or at least grant you strength to continue treading water for now, before you start to swim again.

         In truth, a host of worthy reasons for pursuing an education exist, and you might find that your inspiration shifts and changes frequently en route to a degree. I hope you will spend quality time ruminating about what drives you. Once you have identified an impetus that works for you, at least at this particular moment in time, remind yourself often. (Especially when you are up late at night, working on an assignment that feels like a complete drudgery, or when you have to force yourself to go to one more Zoom meeting class.) Setting an intention may not only keep you motivated, in the general sense, but may, as the actor discovers, meaningfully guide your actions and choices along the way.

A meme during the time of COVID-19 highlighted signage at a Japanese theme park, which apparently invited roller coaster riders to help prevent the spread of the virus by remembering to “please scream inside your heart.” I myself have found that the most effective way for me to manage the simultaneous thrill and terror of plunging down a steep hill, or spiraling swiftly through loop-de-loop, of a theme park ride is, indeed, to scream. I distinctly recall feeling that same kind of mixture, of excitement and fear, while standing in the parking lot outside my freshman dormitory building, that first day that I was scheduled to move on to campus. Notwithstanding the fact that it was a delightful September day, with the sunshine dappling through the colorful autumn leaves on the trees surrounding the decidedly quaint, Tudor style dorm building, truth be told, fear had a decided advantage on me that afternoon. Stomach buzzing with nervous energy and standing there alone, since my single mother had to be at work that day, I was definitely screaming in my heart.

My sense is that students at this historical moment for the United States are even more terrified. What with a raging pandemic and decided social and political unrest, every day brings a new challenge and another social media story that gives us a reason to scream. For some of you, the dream of the potential fun of campus life has been diminished by a lingering fear of catching the virus in that setting, and for others has been entirely supplanted by the reality of having to navigate the strange new digital landscape of online learning. In truth, the times are beyond stressful… they qualify as traumatic. When it comes to pursuing higher education, is it even possible to still enjoy the ride? My hope is that in reading this blog, even if you are already past your first day on campus (whether literally or virtually), you will be empowered to embrace your academic journey, with a little less trepidation and ideally a touch more celebratory joy.

Social media gave birth to the idea for this project. Having served as an instructor to both undergraduate and grad students for nearly two decades, I often came home from my days on campus and offered pithy, witty reflections (if I do say so myself) into cyber space. Nothing is quite so encouraging to a would-be writer as a host of “likes.” Before too long, I began tinkering with crafting potential passages for a book, which just so happened to be around the same time that my daughter was preparing to go off to college herself. Thinking about her heading all the way across the country without me (though my husband was able to take her, so she was not alone her first day) inspired me to endeavor to do more with my writing than simply entertain. I began to consider what I would like to share with her, given my years of experience, both in the classroom and within the larger framework of higher education. How might I write a book to offer wisdom regarding how to navigate this amazing, wonderful, and challenging educational process and opportunity?

Especially in this context? Education doesn’t happen in a vacuum. As you the reader well know, this virus has stirred an already troubled pot of concerns in the United States, such as the ongoing issues of economic disparity, systemic racism, and the dangers of climate change. I have witnessed my fellow instructors struggle with the weight of trying to figure out how to address what was happening in our nation and across the globe, regarding issues that were profoundly impacting our students, all while frantically trying to learn how to teach in new ways (some more effectively than others). Within my field in the humanities, academic inquiry is not so much about providing the right answers to difficult issues, as it is about thoughtfully engaging the living questions of meaning, identity, and value, with which we contend as human beings, in the midst of difficult circumstance. In this social context and historical situation, then, the challenge of how to most effectively create space for students to wrestle with questions that really matter, like… What is truth? Or What makes for a good society?… suddenly took on a whole new level of import. And with the current president of the United States having been impeached for the second time just today, leaning into those questions seems more pressing… so much so that I decided to start up a blog, rather than finish and shop around a completed book.

As a blogger, I will strive to provide you with resources and invite you to wrestle with living questions, in order to help you to decide for yourself how you wish to educate yourself, in order to live successfully within this challenging, sometimes terrifying, and yet still incredibly beautiful world. In these digital pages, I intend to build upon and stretch beyond what I might ordinarily be able to say in the classroom, being as direct, informative, encouraging, and downright thought provoking as I can be. My goal in saying Things That the Professor Cannot Actually Say is to inspire you to ask yourself meaningful questions about your dreams and aspirations for higher education, with the intention of empowering you to make the most of your journey. Along the way, I do indeed hope you will find insights that enhance your ability not only to navigate the loop-de-loops of academia, but to face our current social realities with greater confidence on the rollercoaster ride that is life.