This final installment, concerning Things the Professor Cannot Actually Say regarding The Dreaded Grade series is a doozy. Forget about the grade. Not only have I never declared this to a student, I have never even said it to my own daughter. It kinda goes against every fiber of my being, which I am loathe to admit has been shaped by the competitive culture of achievement in which we all live. Indeed, I suspect some of us are not really certain what education is about apart from the earning of grades.
That acknowledged, I want to share a secret with you. Beyond the realm of grad school applications, no one has ever asked me what my college GPA was. Not a prospective employer, not anyone. In my personal experience, no one gives a rip. Because in the grand scheme of things, a college GPA just doesn’t really matter. So here is the Thing I Cannot Actually Say but am instead going to shout across the internet…
Forget about what grade you are earning. Just let it go. Seriously.
Remember, as I have said elsewhere in this blog, to embrace the process of learning for its own sake. Personal transformation is the ultimate goal here. And you are not your grades. What really matters, while you are pursuing higher education is… What are you learning? How are you incorporating what you are learning into your life? Who are you becoming? If at all possible, (meaning your GPA is not tied to a scholarship, etc…see my previous blog post on “But I Need a Good Grade”), shift your focus to your personal, integrative meaning and purpose in pursuing this educational opportunity. If you can manage to do that, then whatever your grades happen to be, your education will truly become a worthwhile achievement.
However, if you find that you cannot let go of your concerns over grades, or you discover that you have sincere difficulty distinguishing between your worth as a human being and the marks you receive…
If you know that grades stress you out, or cause you to obsess, or will require the consumption of more chocolate, or other substances, than is perhaps strictly wise, in order to face them…
If worry, fear, or anxiety about grades leads you to a place of diminished self esteem or perhaps to thoughts of self harm…
If focusing intensely on grades leads you into ways of being that are not expressive of your best self, then I implore you to do the following:
*Name it. Acknowledge that truth of that challenge. To yourself and others.
*Create an emotional support network of family, friends, peers, professors, advisors, administrators, care animals, or counselors to help keep you on an even keel, while you are in college.
*Be vigilant in engaging in healthy self care and allowing yourself time and space for personally enjoyable, enriching, or nourishing activities.
*Take breaks, and step away from the pressure of higher education, in order to prioritize your overall well being.
*Lastly, be empowered the liberating knowledge that colleges exist that do not employ letter grades. Very fine schools at that. Investigate those educational options online, and give yourself the gift of applying initially, or transferring later, to a university that relies upon narrative evaluations. Indeed, narrative feedback is designed to highlight your gifts, while also encouraging you to develop, simultaneously fostering your academic learning and contributing to your personal growth. It might be just the right fit for you!
Things the Professor Cannot Actually Say 